Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

went to a used bookstore to get out a little bit and take my mind off things only to hear two customers debating whether or not AI was used to evaluate laid off tech employees and this is why i have to get out of the bay area

12:24 AM · February 3, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

Taking care of a human body is too much work

7:01 AM · February 2, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

using your GPS in the south bay is like, "your destination is only 7 minutes away! just get on 3 highways, take 16 exits, and merge across 4 lanes of active traffic. easy!"

9:14 PM · January 31, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

guys get mad at women for wearing makeup saying it falsely enhances their real features yet they are allowed to grow beards to make it look like they have chins

7:34 PM · January 30, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

TMI - Too Much Internet: Here Comes The Big Wave! kelleygreene.substack.com/p/h…

7:31 PM · January 27, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

damn, what am i supposed to do with all the office-related tweets in my drafts folder now???

6:42 PM · January 27, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

Sometimes you just have to channel your layoff rage 🤷🏼‍♀️ thanks to @The_Belladonnas for publishing this one! thebelladonnacomedy.com/layof…

6:37 PM · January 26, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

the thought i just keep coming back to with this layoff is that i should have stolen more office supplies

9:11 PM · January 25, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

spokescandies waking up to being locked out of their email twitter.com/mmschocolate/s…

4:40 PM · January 23, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

not me automatically waking up at 7AM this morning thinking i had to go to work pic.twitter.com/GHFfEB2aGD

4:31 PM · January 23, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

why are people acting like disney is about to demo splash mountain with tnt when it's literally just new characters being put into the exact same ride

6:38 AM · January 23, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

my discord took a few extra seconds to load earlier and my brain was instantly like "THEY LOCKED ME OUT I'M FIRED FROM DISCORD" so yeah just having a normal one over here

11:28 PM · January 21, 2023

Kelley Greene 🐀

@kelleygreene

yep, exactly right @Carnage4Life! thanks for the share. twitter.com/Carnage4Life/s…

5:55 PM · January 21, 2023