Kelley Greene is a writer, performer, and geek from Chicago, Illinois.
My “high school jams” playlist is outing me as a Millennial™️ pic.twitter.com/NASXXgQeH6
If this is not rehearsal for the Righteous Gemstones I don't know what's real anymore twitter.com/MusicalChaotic…
realizing i have a ton in common with the builders in civ 6. i can only do 3-5 tasks and then i need to disappear
Never forget: there are people in this world that bite the silverware when they eat
The parade balloons and I have something in common: we both look way better from far away
I can’t imagine the shame of trying to squirt water in an athlete’s mouth on the sideline and having them decline. I’d walk off the field and never come back
How to go fucking insane when you just want a quick change before dinner after getting off a plane twitter.com/LearnEverydayN…
“That salad is overdressed” okay sure but if it had less dressing on it I’d have to taste the lettuce???
Men can't find the Paris Olympics Mascot on TMI - Too Much Internet kelleygreene.substack.com/p/m…
Things may look bad but I'm still hanging around until James Cameron comes by in a submersible
Swifties: please go after Elon when you're done with Ticketmaster